A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize