I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
