You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
