I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Randomize
