good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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