The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
