Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
