Do vagina's smell?
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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