His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
