it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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