Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
You've changed since you got that strap on
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize