i just wanna soil my oats bro
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
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