I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
