I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize