How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize