i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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