Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
