how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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