I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
