My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
