why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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