You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Randomize
