she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
