They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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