I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
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Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
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Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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