Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I need a beard to bite.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
