All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
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