Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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