you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Randomize
