i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I am mentally ready for anal.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
