She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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