Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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