u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
