Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
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