(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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