I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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