What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
