Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
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