I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
