"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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