A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I party with great urgency now.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize