I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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