but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I think my vagina is haunted
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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