Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
