12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
