i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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