these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
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