grandma shit on top of the toilet
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I party with great urgency now.
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