if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
