i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
