where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize